The Truth Only Hurts When You Let It.

For the first time ever, yesterday I set a stopwatch during my post-work run.

As much as I love running, it doesn’t come naturally, and I’m the first to admit I’m a slow-ass runner. For some time I’ve had the vague goal of registering for a 5k once I get my time under 28 minutes, but despite having set the goal, I’ve done little in terms of progressing it. I run daily, so in a sense I am working towards my goal, but I had no idea where I was at in current ability. I honestly had no idea what to expect when I got back to my car to check the stopwatch.

Truth: My time for 3.1 miles was 36:01.

Reality: Compared to everyone else out in runner-land, that 5k took forever. Here’s the funny thing, though: I’m not everyone else out in runner-land. I’m just me, and that was my time.

Looking at the time on the clock was scary. Writing about it here is, truth be told, even scarier. It means facing my ability and admitting that I’m not as good as I’d like to be. The comfort, though, is that now that I know where I stand, I can work towards change: I can train, I can push myself, and I can be proud of myself when I start to see the time chip away.

The truth can be ugly. It often makes you realize that you’re not who you think you are, and not what you’d like to be.

Dig through the truth: somewhere wrapped up in the reality is a lesson that you’re intended to learn. Don’t look at the reality as an absolute. It does not define you. I am not defined by my absentmindedness or my running times. I’m not defined by my salary, my grades, or the number on my scale.

Women let those things define us. We fixate on them as if they are the entirety of who we are. Ignoring those things won’t make them change. Let it act as a catalyst for change.

In literature, nobody cares about the static characters. The dynamic characters are the ones who the readers cheer for, the ones who appeal to critical thinking, and the ones who drive the plot. Logically, then, what’s the benefit of being a static “character” in your own life? When the truth bitch-slaps you in the face, don’t sit back and take it. Take it with a grain of salt and let it change your perspective, your attitude, and most importantly, your actions.


One Comment on “The Truth Only Hurts When You Let It.”

  1. Sonia says:

    That looks like my 5K time too! No shame 🙂
    I hate that we try to define ourselves in certain ways that you described. I am ME. I still don’t know who I am- I change every day and I love it!

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